Life is Death

Feel so tired sud. Of what? Dream lor. Shit!

Well, for so long, I havent log in my Friendster acc. Olmost 1-2weeks i guess. Den, just yest, I saw my ex viewed my profile. Luckily I set up to be 1-degree. Den he dunno whether is me or not. Cuz my pic is just back body. <feel relief sud>

But i wonder how he manage to find me? I try to type ‘xter’ in the srearch user. But din manage to got my name on it. <curious eh?>

Then that same night, I dreamt about him …

I started walking somewhere ..KL …2gether with John and Wykie. Something like PARK?? or probably Zoo. Sorry. Forgot.

Then while i was walking with Wykie, I saw my ex. I ’sim hoi’ of cause. Hide behind Wykie’s shoulder. Luckily manage to avoid him.

While walking, I try to be more carefull, cause i know he’s around the area joh. Then, sud I saw him again..In front of me this time. He caught me. I try to sim hoi. But failed. He take my hand. Wykie go away..Den John came.. Ah..Wykie go away cause her BF call him.

John came, I told john to help me out. Den 3 of us, went to a quite place. Seems like forest. Den i told my ex to let go off my hand. He said he miss me so much. *toooootttt*

Den i walked away 2gether wif john. Dat nite, I received a mms. It’s from my ex. Wonder how he manage to got my 016….8367 no. Den i mai think, probably he found wykie and wykie gave me. I bomb joh.

He kept sending sending. One of the mms show - his room, his belt. 5-6belts i guess. I dunno why he wan to show all that to me..

Den..I woke up! Feel so tired, after all those running and hidding.

Because of You…This is the song I am listernin right now. Ughh..Life is so.. fucking everything.. Wahhaha.. >> Shit me!!

Since living alone, feel …feel.. dunno how to say. Watever..hOME still the best way to live. The truth. Cause I’m one of the reason. Well, chinese ppl said ‘where ever where u are, what u do, Your home is still the safetest place ‘. (You wont feel this way if you are outstation ppl) Cause once u moved out, you have to think and think in finding the best things, important thgs esp. This that. Mix with better friends. Treasure.

You oso need to find a room. A room with good location. Have stalls, kliniks…Transport and bla bla.. Cause a room, u have noting include.

I’ve been lookin for a room. Just a room.. almost a mth. Luckily i found one. 2gether with my AD-June. She took me d. Thx for her. B4 havin this room, i’ve been looking like hell. True hell. Until i fall sick. Really. Been thinking alot. But now, I need to think about stuff..such like Matt, curtains, bla bla..

Thanks to wykie oso. Cause her aunty let me stay at thr for a moment. They treat me nice. Really nice. Noting i can pay back, except teach her daughter to belajar rajin rajin ya. Having a temp room, I’ve been having hard time in sleeping. Really hard time.

But whatever, I need to survive. B more independant. Cause I’m the one who wanna runaway. Have enough limit. Most of my frenz have oredi knew what happened to me.

Sometimes, sat i no need go to work, i hv to go kl..look for thgs. At the begining, need tshirt..this la..that la.. Cause i hv nuttin man. Cause whatever i do, whenever i go, hv to use money from now on. Hopefully part of my frenz who reading this blog of mine, will treasure what they have right now. This moment.

Most of my stuff still at my room.. My Ori Cds of Nic.. My teddys..haha.. Then, my d’sign stuff. many many more which i cant think of it right now. Some moment, I have been stressing out. Been down. Told my Godbro how i felt. But he’s there always for me. Hear my feelings. B my side. Thankx Bro! U’re best for me! Cause he understand what i need. How i feel. He’s been there, praying for me, since the day i look for a room.

Well, i gotta go.. Need do MAXIIMPACT!!!

Wah…Chinese new year cumin soon… And i’m sick.. Urgh! Started to feel sick since Sat. But it was sore throat. Now, it’s getting worst, and recently i have fever. Uh. Bought panadol, and ate 2. Then yest ate 2 oso. Mornin, went to klcc kino there wif wykie. CcCcCcCCCC…..Den copy some website. haha. Den w.shop, and bek looo…Wah..tired ner.. V took ktm, den lrt. Reach hm, wash clothes and  sleep joh. Sud feel body hot. so mai sleep lor. John yest suppose bek to kuantan at nite. Since i was sick, He came and just to teman me eat. Den finished eat, i told him to go bek, cuz too late joh..

Uh..wat i want to write..i oso dunno. Too long din write blog joh.. Nicole yest sms me..ajak me and john go makan at her hse. yummmyy** Den..i wan see goldie.. Must b very very big size joh.. Makan byk. hehe..

But mostly, hopefully i can find a room nearby / at menjalara. Uh. So i no need think byk ltr. Later need online check got or not. cuz left 2weeks onli.

Called my koh, told him what i have found. But he say not worth it. Ltr, i feel oso not worth it. Cuz is not include bills and kenot use the ruang tamu. Jialat da indian fellow! fuckerzz*

Shit.. Sick oso wan scold ppl. Nowonder ppl curse me until i sick. haha.